I have a confession to make: I skyjumped 61 stories high weeks ago and I was not one bit scared.

I’m not being all cool and boastful of not being jittery in anticipation of the jump; in fact, it really truly bothered me, hence this blog post. That fact that I was not scared, scares me. I could speak and walk pre-jump as if what I was going to do was nothing more than a stroll in the park. I couldn’t feel the adrenalin pumping through my system. Nothing. I waited until I was standing on the edge; I looked down the great height. Nothing. Read rest of story…

My cousin twitted: “… why do good things happen to bad people?”

It seems unfair, huh? I don’t understand that too. But maybe I could take a shot at the answer.

Because these “bad people” do have a hard time seeing God’s blessings. So God’s angels ramped up the graces to them in hopes that they see the hand of God in all being sent to them. Lucky if they change in time to receive these gifts from God properly… but if they don’t would you believe as much as I do that in time, they themselves will ruin such gifts from above? Read rest of story…

Why is that when families get together, the most often asked question to a young teener/adult single family member if she already has a boyfriend? I unashamedly say the truth. Like today my tita asked me – I say, single.

She prodded on – am I not jealous of my sister and her family. Nope, not really. I’d rather be there to spoil my neice to bits than have one of my own right now. Of course, bakit ko iisipin yun – single ako ngayon eh. Haha

A foreigner for a boyfriend? I said, sure, I’d prefer black. Tita encouraged me, go for the blue-eyed. I conceded, okay, black with blue-eyes.

I don’t know. What’s with all this one has to be committed so that you don’t look so sorry in the eyes of everyone else? Promise, I’m not bitter, after all I’ve been through with a cheat (oops! did I just contradict myself?). It’s just that, it will be best to be ready for this, right? I mean commitment is a commitment even if its not yet marriage. Befriend people, get to know them but one does not need to rush into dating or commitments right? Kaya madaming hearts strewn in the battlefield called love. Madaming hindi handa. Madaming may issues pa sa sarili and they rush in to be the other half of a ruined person. And if they stay in the relationship just so not lose face, they ruin their being further. They’re depressed in the relationship but stay by reasoning out “great love”. If they do get out of the relationship, they’re often too ruined. Mahaba-habang proseso to fix themselves but then they rush in to a new commitment in hopes that the new love could fix them.

Hmm… wala lang. A little ranting. I’m not claiming to be a love guru. Or I’m completely fixed and ready for a commitment. Yoko lang ng ganung pressure now that I’m starting to appreciate my long forgotten singlehood.

What a lazy rainy Monday. I’m so tempted to go out and splurge on shopping but what would it bring? Temporary happiness? Ayown! Haha Excuse ng nagtitipid.

So here I am, just stayed at home. Thinking. Pondering. Feeding on my internet addiction.

Been trying to go back through my earliest memories. Just relaxed recalling of nothing specific. I’m still unsure if I’m truly surprised that those random memories that were easily recalled are not of specific important events like birthdays or Christmases. Nor was it of getting hold of material things. Nor any of my firsts – first crush, first love, first kiss. Nor where they any specific successes. Read rest of story…